Find what to say...

[___Tola___]

Hi everybody,

I've got one serious problem concentrated on speaking. It is that when someone talk to me or ask some question, I rarely answer fast as I require and I always say "eh..... or m...." while I don't know what to say.
So I need  some advices to solve this problem. I don't want to say like this and Do we have  the appropriate words or phrases instead of these?

Thank,
Tola

[Keo Somala]

Hi Tola, 

Please don't feel bad about "pausing" before you answer someone's question. This doesn't really matter. It's the first step for you to get used to speaking English. Practice makes perfect. The words like "err...well....hmm" are good sometimes to be used when you are thinking. Like me I can't reply right away, so I often use "well". . Anyway, this is my suggestion. 

[Kimlong]

Don't be upset with this matter Tola! No one is perfect. You know even the native speakers often use the word like er, em, well and so forth while they are thinking or hesitate to say sth.

In order to fluentize  our speaking is to practice speaking, and as well as learn to think.Why learn to think is useful for speaking, because if we think, it means we teach our brain to get used to answering questions quickly.I mean we are flexible in answering.By this way we can reduce our unneccessary words like em,er, or well.....which you don't want to use.

But remember Tola, rarely do our speaking partners value our conversation depend 100% on using those words, but on how you convey the information they need, or how much you respond to their questions.

Anyway, don't afraind using those words! See you on the amazing party!

Kimlong

[___Tola___]

Thank you for your advice, but you know the problem I have been facing is I always focus only on grammar before speaking. If not so, I'll have nothing to say and I sometimes get stress when I forget the structure I am willing to say. And then I pause and only giving smile to the partners. So what should I have to change my habit in order to overcome this problem?

Thank,